#ThingsIWontMissAboutThisJob

As it's my last day in the office tomorrow, I was having a little think about just how "lovely" it has been to work here. It set me off on a bit of a twitter rant - helpfully summarised for you here. I should stress, these are all actual things that go on on a daily basis (and yes, that includes those things near the bottom of the list that are at best inappropriate and at worst, possibly criminal). So let me begin......

#ThingsIWontMissAboutThisJob Not getting a hello from my boss if I'm more than 1 minute late for work.

#ThingsIWontMissAboutThisJob Being given a guilt trip if I need to go to an appointment during working hours.

#ThingsIWontMissAboutThisJob Not being allowed to take my sick cat to the vet during working hours

#ThingsIWontMissAboutThisJob The daily competition of who got least sleep

#ThingsIWontMissAboutThisJob The daily competition of who had the worst journey

#ThingsIWontMissAboutThisJob The boss being negative about anything positive that happens to someone else

#ThingsIWontMissAboutThisJob The boss thinking everyone is totally incapable of anything

#ThingsIWontMissAboutThisJob Particularly when we're all more capable of everything than him

#ThingsIWontMissAboutThisJob The boss being a control freak

#ThingsIWontMissAboutThisJob The boss slurping his tea and swishing it around his mouth

#ThingsIWontMissAboutThisJob The boss constant clearing his throat and weird snorty sniffy thing

#ThingsIWontMissAboutThisJob The boss coughing without covering his mouth.

#ThingsIWontMissAboutThisJob The boss using office scissors to cut his fingernails, at his desk, next to me

#ThingsIWontMissAboutThisJob The boss not wearing shoes in the office.

#ThingsIWontMissAboutThisJob Except shoes with buckles for going to the loo. That jingle all the time.

#ThingsIWontMissAboutThisJob The fact that the boss stinks #1 (never dry cleans his suits)

#ThingsIWontMissAboutThisJob The fact that the boss stinks #2 (doesn't shower in the morning)

#ThingsIWontMissAboutThisJob The boss being a sexist, racist snob.

#ThingsIWontMissAboutThisJob The boss choosing which magazine to sit on

#ThingsIWontMissAboutThisJob The boss choosing which magazine to take to the bathroom

#ThingsIWontMissAboutThisJob The boss sticking sellotape on his face

#ThingsIWontMissAboutThisJob The boss constantly putting his hand down the front of his trousers

#ThingsIWontMissAboutThisJob The boss constantly putting his hand down the back of his trousers

#ThingsIWontMissAboutThisJob The boss putting tissue down the back of his trousers

#ThingsIWontMissAboutThisJob The boss being an all round general t***er

You see, I just love this place so much. Maybe I should think about asking for my job back.

I want to work hard but...

I wouldn’t say I’ve exactly worked hard all my life. At school and university I did what I considered to be the bare minimum (although admittedly still probably more than a lot of others) to get through with OK grades. But once I actually started working for a living I would say I put 100% into everything I’ve done. I haven’t moved jobs an awful lot (6 years in my last one, 3 before that) and I’m genuinely quite loyal, which means that I want the company to succeed and I’ll do what I’m paid to do to the best of my ability. Don’t for one minute think that I’m one of the lucky few that has always had the perfect job within the perfect company and with the perfect colleagues. Far from it, but even then I still give it my all.

But things have changed. I now find I don’t have enough to do and even the stuff that I do is really rather tedious. It’s very admin heavy (I’m not an administrator) and in no way stretches my mental ability. I sometimes feel like my poor little brain cells are going to sleep one by one and gradually falling into a final, everalsting hibernation. My boss is aware that it’s become very admin heavy (I use the word heavy in a relative context) and suggests that we look at an additional part-time administrator. The problem is, take that away from me and I really am left with pretty much nothing to do. Weird thing is, I’m not (touch wood) at risk of redundancy because I’m needed for those “just in case” scenarios (like the printer doesn’t work because someone hasn’t put paper in – and no, that’s nothing to do with my job it’s just no one else seems competent enough to work this out). I should count myself lucky really.

But I’m bored. Bored beyond belief and I'm finding it soul destroying. When the boss isn’t around I can at least have a nose around the internet (in the last week I have learnt about semolina, this history of computers 1939-1944, how to trade shares, quinoa, Antony & Cleopatra and the rise and fall of Egypt). But when he’s here, a have to at least try to look busy. Some days I’m even so bored and lacklustre that I can’t even be bothered to do the small things that need doing – it took me a week to go up to the second floor to photocopy a two page document.  I’ve tried finding more things to do but, short of actually doing a paper clip audit (now there’s an idea), I think I’ve just about exhausted all avenues.

The days drag and I feel weary at the end of them and by the time we get around to Sunday afternoon I’m already dreading the tedium of the week ahead. I’m worried about the long term impact it’s having on my overall motivational levels and whether I’ll ever be truly inspired to put my heart and soul into another job.

So what should I do. Stick around and be miserable in a job that pays ok, or look for something that will at least stretch the mind but only pay me half the money? Time to start making some decisions.

I just want to work hard.

An ode to tangly headphones

Black of form, all curved and bendy,

Headphones of mine, you are my friendy.

You help to pass with spoken pages,

Journeys that would have taken ages.

Music’s muse is your device,

An electromagnetic paradise,

With treble, bass, and mid-range clear,

You sit so snugly in my ear.

Your little voice is always soothing

Regardless of the mood that I’m in,

You see me through the fetid gym,

But I really wish that you could swim.

And yet, despite your splendid features,

You are the most fickle of creatures,

So I ask you, from this pit of woe:

Why do you tangle so?

For when you’re done at end of day,

I tidy your long limbs away,

I tuck you in - not leave you dangling,

To ensure no risk of you entangling,

But when I reach you in the morning,

With no rhyme, no reason, nor broadcast warning,

To my heavy heart’s dismay,

I find you all in disarray!

I pick you up, my palms a-sweaty

To find some headphone-esque spaghetti,

All tangled, twisted and cruelly knotted

And to think before I was besotted!

Oh headphones I thought you were my friend,

But you test my patience to the end,

Ten minutes each morning I spend with thee,

Wrestling your little tangly legs free.

So be careful, oh headphones, for my will is thin.

You’d also fit snugly in the bin.

My local community website - an outsiders view

In response to this thread on Sydenham Town Forum http://bit.ly/r1U4XN

I have lived in Sydenham for nearly 9 years and first discovered the Sydenham.org.uk  website a few years ago. Even though I’ve lived in the area for the best part of a decade, work has meant that there has been little time left to investigate my local area.  So when my lifestyle changed a little I was at first a reasonably regular visitor to the site, taking an interest in local developments, community events etc etc. I often perused the forums and on a couple of occasions found useful recommendations for tradesmen. I was really keen to try and get to know my local area better.  

But more recently, I’ve become less inclined to look at the site. Although it is intended as a forum, rather than a “news” site, the fact that it has a news section, history, info etc is an added bonus. But if you are going to carry those sorts of pages, then the news should be up to date and the other pages should be updated, kept fresh, new information added. Otherwise there’s little point.

But I digress. Going back to the forum. I agree with what some of the posters say about some of the other regulars: whilst most are interesting, mildly amusing and have something constructive to offer, others are aggressive and bordering on offensive. Personally, I don’t tend to get easily offended and take what people say with a pinch of salt (or give the benefit of the doubt to a sarcastic side which hasn’t come across in electronic format). That said, I’d rather not get embroiled in those types of debates and so have never got involved with the forum. I spend enough time on other forms of social media as it is, both for personal enjoyment and for work purposes.

I’m such a late comer to the site – I understand it’s been going for years, will have had its own agenda which no doubt has changed over that time, and the regulars enjoy using it for what it is. From an outsider’s point of view I think you could entice more new people not by radically changing the forum – but by revisiting the rest of the site. How about updating the news pages, with details of upcoming events for example. Yes, these can be announced in forum posts, but surely those posts are more about discussion, debate, sharing of ideas and information. Specific announcements are one off statements (which can always be followed up in the forum of course). A recent example: I live close to Mayow Park (the Silverdale side) – I understand there was an open air showing of The Italian Job last week. I knew nothing about this (even though I’d recently been on the site) and only found out about it by overhearing 2 people on the train home who were part of the organisation. Maybe there was something lurking about on the site – but as forum posts work on a “real-time” basis and many don’t have time to go digging about, that type of thing can be easy to miss. I liked Tim’s recent post on the playscape opening in Mayow park – but I probably would never have seen it without him posting the link on this thread (which incidentally I came across on Twitter).

By small developments to the site, just to keep it fresh and relevant (without turning it into a full-blown news website) you will entice more passive users to the forums – hopefully getting them engaged as more active users. I’m not proposing that it would need to compete in the same way as some of the other community sites out there, but if you want to mix it up a bit, get some new blood in and hopefully create a greater collective voice against all those proposed train timetable changes, shocking redevelopments or introduction of permit parking, or just getting more people involved in local events, then making it an overall more user-friendly site would be a good start.

There is definitely still an argument for still having forums such of this, as opposed to traditional media, blogs, Facebook, Twitter etc. But whether you’re a local site or a multinational organisation, someone somewhere still has to make a decision about what the site is trying to achieve and make it work to the best of its ability within that remit. So if the intention is to just be a forum, get rid of the other stuff (out-of-date info doesn’t appeal to anyone) and stick to the formula already in place.

I initially intended to post this on the Sydenham Town Forum itself - however I feel I've droned on a bit, gone a little off track and will probably be accused of sticking my nose in where it doesn’t belong, but if I bring myself to voice my opinion on something, I guess I must be at the very least passionate about it. Bring it on I say!

Penny Pinching

A few times in the last couple of weeks I’ve been short changed. It’s by a pitiful amount, literally a penny or two, but still, it’s my penny or two and surely it’s up to me to decide whether I want it or not. I must stress, this is does not appear to be some “honest” mistake – when I question them, they sort of look at me, shrug and mumble something along the lines of “it’s just a penny” or “oh right, I didn’t realise you wanted it”. WTF is usually the first thing that springs to mind.

It’s not just independent “corner shop” type outfits that seem to be adopting this practice  - today a major national card retailer made this choice for me which obviously I am incapable of making for myself.

I admit, I’m not a fan of having a load of coppers jingling in my purse (I much prefer the gold shiny ones), so generally, if there’s a charity box around, be it Guide Dogs for the Blind, Poverty in Africa, or Save the Lesser-spotted Grumbleweeble, someone, somewhere will benefit from my extremely modest levels of philanthropy. But like I say, that’s my decision to make and if I wanted to take all my coppers home, save them up and then take a truck load along to annoy my local bank (if I had one), then that’s my prerogative.

So why then, Mrs Shopkeeper, have you determined that you will decide where my left-over pennies will end up (i.e. your till)? Sure, it’s unlikely it will leave me unable to pay may mortgage this month, but the way I see it, you’re actually diddling those charities out of money. I’m pretty sure we’re all familiar with the saying “every little counts”.

My level of frustration is totally disproportionate to the amount of money we’re talking about, but it’s the principle that counts.

The bravest girl in the world - for one day only

I did something really brave today. I didn’t save anyone’s life: no rescuing people from burning buildings; no saving old ladies from being mugged. But something perhaps only I will consider really brave.

Today, July 2^nd 2011 at 12.30pm, I swam a mile in the Thames. It’s not the most strenuous feat in the world, but to me, it was possibly the biggest mental challenge I have ever faced.

The “race” distance is 1 mile. That’s 64 lengths of my local 25 metre pool. I could do that without too much trouble, in around 45 minutes. After signing up in January, months passed and I didn’t really think too much more about it.

Saturday July 2^nd – race day. A bowl of pasta for breakfast, a last check I had all my equipment and off we headed.

At 12pm our “wave” (i.e. the 12.30pm swimmers) was allowed to enter the acclimatisation zone – a separate area of the dock with just enough space to get in and have a quick swim around. A quick organised warm up at the start line and then we were off.

One mile in open water. In the Thames.

Given the drag of the wetsuit, the avoidance of other swimmers and the (very) slight current, I expected it to take me an hour, maybe a few minutes more. I completed it in 46 minutes – I was ecstatic. I crossed the line, climbed out of the water and happily received my winner’s medal. Job done. My training had obviously paid off – it wasn’t as hard as I thought.

It doesn’t sound that much and I guess it might sound like I completed it with relative ease. But for me it wasn’t that easy.

You see I’m a decent swimmer, so the distance wasn’t a problem; never really a concern. But I suffer from panic attacks (not often, but enough) and my biggest fear was not being able to start in the first place. The water would be cold, dark, deep and non-chlorinated. Everything I wasn’t used to and everything I feared. I won’t even swim in the sea. That’s what made me most nervous beforehand. If I had a panic attack in the water, that would be dangerous for sure, but not being able to finish the race was something I couldn’t comprehend. I would be letting down my charity (Macmillan), but most of all it was a personal battle for myself. I didn’t really let on to anyone about this – it’s a personal battle, something that embarrasses me. I find it impossible to explain so sometimes it’s just easier not to. The morning before the race, I woke up and cried. I was petrified.

But, I had my own secret weapon. I was doing it for Macmillan, a charity that I have utmost respect for. I have friends, parents of friends and even people I only know on Twitter who have battled with cancer. Some have come through, others haven’t, but Macmillan is a name I keep hearing constant praise for, so my decision was easy. And how was that my secret weapon? Mind over matter. As I got in the cold, murky water and looked as far in front of me as I could see (which was only the half way point) I thought about those I know who have suffered from cancer. If they have been able to face the pain, the sadness, the treatment, the rehabilitation, the not knowing and the knowing the inevitable then panic or no panic, I could stick my head in that water and swim. It was a strong emotion – I actually cried as I crossed the start line (but I haven’t told anyone that, so keep it to yourself). And I did it. I just kept swimming, took it in my own time and finished the race. Tired, emotional but elated.

So that’s why, for one day only, I’m going to nominate myself as the bravest girl in the world. Tomorrow it’s someone else’s turn.

p.s thank you to all my friends, family and Twitter pals for your support. And a special thanks to Mr Tizz who thankfully waited till after the race to tell me about his nightmare!

To strike or not to strike? Why I'm sitting on the fence.

When I woke up this morning, switched on the TV and saw the latest news about today’s strikes, my immediate feeling was “get back to work and stop being a bloody nuisance”. It’s deeply unfair that the kids should have to suffer (although, when I think about it I would have been delighted at the chance of a “special” day off school, so I think we can gloss over that one swiftly). Ok, so the parents then who work and have to take time off – it’s a huge disruption for them (although again, I suspect at least some will be secretly pleased of an opportunity to have a chance day off, or, even better, to work from home).

And then, as I waited for the kettle to boil, I considered exactly why I was so annoyed about it all. Well, because with all these public sector types striking, it was surely going to cause me severe disruptions as I go about my daily business. But after further consideration, I realised that actually, I can’t really see how it is going to DIRECTLY affect me. I don’t have kids, I don’t need to renew my passport, I can’t get any time away from work to visit any Welsh museums and I’m not planning on any trips.

So by the time I arrived at my desk at 8.30am I decided that I was firmly in the “don’t care” camp. I’ve done my best to avoid any coverage of it today in the news, on Twitter or wherever – I tire of news very quickly you see.

And then I read a Daily Mail article (I found myself on their site accidently I might add (my views on that particular “news” paper are nothing if not forthright)). My oh my. In the space of 1000 or so words, I suddenly found myself leaping off that particular fence more quickly than a cat that had just found a splinter in its backside. The hysterical “opinion” got me so irked, I found myself disagreeing with everything it was saying, purely as a matter of contrariness.

But it did get me thinking. If I was told that the terms of my pension were going to change I’d be mightily peed off too. Yes a final salary pension scheme is unsustainable in this day and age, but still, it’s what you were expecting and to have that taken away from you is going to at the very least rub you up the wrong way. And I think that’s why I’ve suddenly become more sympathetic to the cause. I’ve seen many comments this afternoon about how we are all going through tough times (whether in the private or public sector) so we all just have to grin and bear it, tighten our belts etc etc, but actually, a lot of the measures we are “grinning and bearing” at the moment are (no matter how hard they are to swallow) relatively short-term. I say relatively, we could be talking a couple of years or so but ultimately shouldn’t affect our retirement too much. I am of course being very generalist – some people are being hit much harder than others – I guess I’m one of the lucky ones.

And actually, everyone I know (well most of them at least) has loudly voiced their opinion (i.e. moaned) about Government austerity measures or the fact that they’re not getting a pay rise for the second year running, or, heaven forbid, a bonus. I’m as guilty as the next person of this. I don’t mind that we whinge, it’s human nature after all. But that’s my point – we do whinge, so why shouldn’t the teachers, or the passport office, or the jobcentre staff. Ok, so they’re showing their annoyance with their feet and at the picket-lines, but ask yourself, if that was an option to you, would you REALLY not consider it? Honestly? Maybe some of you wouldn’t and personally I find it hard to really answer that without ever having been in that position, but I very much doubt I’d dismiss it out of hand.

I’m still not saying it’s right (I’ve found myself creeping slowly back onto that fence as the afternoon has gone on), but I really do believe there’s more to it than many people realise. Those that have always worked in the private sector (myself included) will probably never fully understand and, if I’m honest, I feel some of my generation’s opinions of unions have been forever tainted by the continuing exploits of a certain Mr Robert Crow (particularly those of us that live and work in and around London).

Although I consider myself a reasonably bright lass, I am worryingly ignorant when it comes to all things political. My views on today’s strikes would likely be denounced by the left, the right and anyone in between. What about all the disruption? What about the effect on the economy? What happens to all those 999 calls that need answering? Yes, all very valid points and probably all valid enough reasons why I should hop back over to the “go back to work you bunch of workshy greedy public sector layabouts” side of the fence. But I was compelled to write this not to make a political stand, nor to say it’s right or it’s wrong, but to put some individual human emotion into what is an extremely politically charged argument.

And I quite like my view from the fence, so if it’s all the same with you, I’d like to spend the afternoon up here.